Waiting

Every morning when my alarm goes off at 5, I pull myself out of bed to log a couple hours of editing my novel and researching literary agents. This long road (that I hope ends in publication!) reminds me how difficult it is to be in a season of waiting. I spent what felt like an eternity waiting to find the man who would be my “other half,” then together we waited through two long years before finding out we were pregnant with Kate. Now, I’m in another wait for a dream. I’m trying to rest in the wait, but I know from experience that’s easier said than done.

One thing I’ve learned from the waiting game is that I need to stick close to truth — to what Scripture says about me — rather than pinning my self-worth on something that’s so out of my control. It’s easy to look at every response from an agent or editor as a validation or rejection of my skills, even of me as a person. In the same way, it’s easy to look at test scores, a dateless Friday night, a job offer that doesn’t pan out, or another negative pregnancy test as an assessment about who we are, rather than a result of living in this messy, fallen world. 

Several years ago, in the midst of our season of fertility doctors, I read this verse from Isaiah: “If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river, your well-being like the waves of the sea.” I craved peace in the middle of our chaos and uncertainty, so I scoured Scripture for verses that spoke to how to live in the midst of waiting. What I found did breathe peace to my anxious heart. The verses reminded me that great men and women who came before me had to wait on the Lord for their own dreams. What feels so crushing and immediate in our lives right now probably won’t always feel that way, but God gives us a way to truly rest in our wait.

Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the Lord. (Psalms 31:24)

I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry. (Psalms 40:1)

The Lord is good to those whose hope is in Him, to the one who seeks Him. (Lamentations 3:25)

Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him. (Psalms 37:7)

I feel like I’ve spent much of my adult life waiting for one thing or another, but isn’t that always the life of a Christian? We can live our lives, love the people around us and pursue our dreams, but we are always waiting on the day of glory that is to come. As it is said at Red Mountain Church, we are living in the “now but not yet.” May God give us courage and patience as we wait for all that is to come.

Lauren can be reached at LaurenKDenton@gmail.com. You can also find her on Twitter @LaurenKDenton.