Hurry up and slow down!

More than ever, Kate is repeating things she hears us say. She says things like, “Hang on, Mom,” “I’ll be right back,” and “Be gentle with baby sister,”— things she obviously hears us (especially me) say often. Something I’ve noticed myself saying a lot is, “Come on Kate, we’re in a hurry.” I didn’t think much about my always being in a hurry until a few days ago when I went in Kate’s room to get her up from her nap and the first thing she said was, “Are we in a hurry, Mom?”

I remember my own mom telling me that when my brother and I were young, she accepted the fact that she had to move a little slower. Either my brother or I would inevitably want to stop and look at a dog or pick something up off the ground just when she was trying to get somewhere on time. She realized she just had to slow down and be okay with things moving at a slower pace. It’s taking me a while to learn that lesson.

I find myself getting frustrated when Kate dawdles on the way to the car when we’re in a hurry to get somewhere. Or she wants to walk instead of ride in the stroller, and I tell her she has to ride so we can...you guessed it, hurry. Why is my life always moving at such a fast pace? Or if it’s not, why do I think it needs to be?

Because the reality is, there’s not much in my life right now that I need to be on time for — or at least nothing that can’t be done in 10 minutes instead of right now. A good portion of my life consists of feeding my kids (whether that’s at socially acceptable mealtimes or at three in the morning), exercising when I can, taking Kate to school and picking her up, going to the grocery store and going to church on Sunday nights.

Other than picking Kate up by 1 p.m. and hopefully making it to church before the sermon starts, I really don’t need to be rigid about the time schedule — something that’s difficult for a person like me who really likes predictability and plans. But I’m starting to see that if my youngest daughter needs to eat again or if my very active and curious three year old needs to stop and examine a ladybug, so be it. Most everything else can wait without my world coming unglued.

My mom learned this lesson, and, in fact, every parent has to learn this at some point. I am no exception. Life doesn’t have to be lived going fast. I don’t need to be in a hurry to do everything. I’d like for my daughters to see me enjoying our life together — not always hurriedly moving them through it from one task to the next. It’s especially crucial for me to focus on this here as the holiday season is about to begin. I wrote in this column a year ago about not hurrying through the holidays. Maybe I’ll finally learn that lesson this year!

Laura Denton can be reached at laurenkdenton@gmail.com.