Long before my first novel was released into the world, I knew if I wanted to write and publish books, talking about those books would pretty much be a job requirement.
A lover of books myself, I’d been to lots of conferences and festivals where authors spoke to audiences about their books and about writing in general, and I loved to soak in what they had to say. I knew if I was going to be in their shoes, with a book out on shelves, I’d have to be able to do thesame thing.
The only problem was I had an almost-debilitating fear of speaking in front of other people. It didn’t really matter if it was a room full of people or my community group at church — if other people were watching me, I could barely get through a few sentences without my heart racing and my face feeling as hot as the ever-loving sun.
The whole time I was revising and editing and querying that first novel, I worried, I prayed, I generally panicked about when these speaking engagements would start, knowing no one would want to buy a book from the girl who threw up on the stage!
Soon after “The Hideaway” was released, I had my first “appearance” at a bookstore in Marietta, Georgia, with two other authors.
On the drive there, I prayed and worried and went over everything I wanted to say about my book. When I arrived and we got settled, I was the first to speak. I thought, “OK, here it comes,” but the strangest thing happened. I started talking and the nerves didn’t come. My words were calm and clear and my cheeks stayed at a respectable temperature.
It was revolutionary.
When Matt asked me later how it went, I raved. It was amazing, I said. Incredible. So much better than I thought.
“That’s great,” he said. “How many people were there?”
“Six.”
He stared at me. “Only six?”
“Yes, but it didn’t matter! I wasn’t nervous! At all!”
I’m still not sure he understands how driving two-and-a-half hours to talk about my book to six people (two of whom worked at the shop) could be such a remarkable thing.
It’s been two years since that trip to Marietta and somehow, by no less than the grace of God, I am a recovering glossaphobic (yes there’s a word for it, and that’s it!).
Don’t ask me to give a TED talk, and if I’m asked again to talk live on a morning news show, the quivering voice and shaky hands may come right back. But I can now confidently stand in front of a room full of people and talk about life and books and writing and how sometimes all you need are six people sitting in folding chairs to help you get over a life-long fear.
I recently bumped into a friend I hadn’t seen in a long time, and she congratulated me on my new book.
“Isn’t it cool that we can still come into our own when we’re in our 40s?” she said to me. I smiled and agreed, though on the inside, I was thinking, “Ahem, not quite in my 40s yet, thanks.”
Then I thought — wait a minute, she’s right! I’ve spent most of the last year forgetting whether I was 38 or 39, but now, it doesn’t matter, because this month, I turn 40. And the more I ponder what my friend said, the more I realize she’s exactly right.
It’s easy to think our best years are behind us — maybe the fun and lack of responsibility of childhood, or the ease of life before kids — but I really do think life keeps churning out lovely and unexpected surprises alongthe way.
I’ve seen women become small business owners, run marathons, discover a talent for painting, and go back to school to learn a new skill — all well after those young andcarefree days.
For me, this whole books adventure has been one of the more unexpected things in my life, but possibly even more so is the fact that not only can I write these books, but I can stand proudly in front of people and talk about them. I never could have done that when I was 30.
I’m thinking the 40s are going to be just fine.
My novels “The Hideaway,” “Hurricane Season” and the recently released “Glory Road” are available wherever books are sold. You can reach me by email at Lauren@LaurenKDenton.com, visit my website LaurenKDenton.com or find me onInstagram @LaurenKDentonBooks, Twitter @LaurenKDenton or on Facebook@ LaurenKDentonAuthor.
